I’m not Willing to Wait Until it’s Too Late

When we step into Personal Development

- and in this story Professional Development

It’s to improve our lives -

Improve the quality of our life and make it better

AND. To have tools when shit gets hard

Regardless of what got you there, whether it was a genuine desire for growth,

work sent you, or because everything in life seemed to be falling a part,

Development is there for all of it - and all the in between

You are being responsible for your own life and this is YOU taking care of you!

When I applied for colleges many years ago, I was applying for what interested me

and to get as far away from my hometown as possible

(Resonate with anyone?)

Little did I know, when I was excepted into the Rehabilitation Services program years ago,

That I would be drawn to helping at risk families, and youth

Little did I know that I would be taking continuing education courses of

“Non conflict Resolution” aka, how to get out of the sketchy, potentially violent situations we would encounter,

or “Med” courses so we would know what they looked like if they were being abused by our clients

Or “First aid” with a heavy emphasis on what to do if you came across an OD

Or “Drug awareness” to identify the signs of meth use, and other substances, as well as understanding what

a “meth lab” looked and smelled like, just incase we came across it in one of our Child Welfare cases

AND finally “Suicide Intervention” just in case we came across a client who was suicidal

They were all there to prepare us for when shit got hard and things weren’t okay

And little did I know, that many years later, I would be asking someone, on the other end of the phone

“Promise me you won’t hurt yourself for the next 24 hours”

Followed by a “please call mental health and get into your doctor and tell me when you’ve taken those steps”

As I live a fair distance from them - and they weren’t alone, and they needed the question to be asked - I needed to ask the question so I knew I did what I could in that moment

These aren’t encounters that happen often in a persons life unless you’re a Paramedic, RCMP, Rescue or

something of that nature - I am none of those And. For me, I feel like these instances have been happening my whole life

I have been surrounded with Mental Health battles my whole life

My family of origin

My son as a recovering addict and veteran with PTSD

And in the past, I’ve had my own battles

The result of a dark abyss of feeling like I had no where to turn and no one to talk to as I was being bullied

into submission in high school

And later on, through the depths of darkness of abusive relationships and even as recently as a year ago

with the break up of a narcissistic relationship (noting that I don’t toss that term around lightly - and now that

I’m on the other side of the no contact, recognize it for what it was.

What saved me? The tools

Who saved me?

ME and having the right people to turn to

The tools of self care, and noting that I can not take of anyone or anything else if my cup is empty

The tools of knowing my mental limits, my boundaries, and when I was at capacity - I start saying no to a

whole lot of people and things when I’m tapped

The right people will get it and be okay with it.

The wrong people will be hurt, and lead with ego in their response

Of which. They are responsible for and are noting their place in your life

The point is

Suicide is a heavy topic

Mental Health and the declines of mental health is a heavy topic

And no one wants to talk about it

There is no sugar coating how challenging it is to be in a field when clients, are struggling to this degree,

Let alone family

And this is precisely WHY I work in this field

I have tools

I was born a healer

I was born with the gift of giving safe space and allowing people to be genuinely who they are, in their depths or

at their best

A gift that seems incredibly rare these days

And. I know that I wouldn’t be able to maintain this work if I didn’t take care of me

I also know, I am not responsible for anyone else’s mental health

THEY have to take responsibility for their own mental health

From the way they treat their body, mind and heart daily

- move well, eat well, be aware of what is consumed (social media, tv, reading, listening to)

To seeking out treatment and the programs available for their treatment AS WELL AS the medications

Medication is a tool - there is ZERO shame in needing that tool

Seeking out a counsellor/therapist/psychologist is a tool/resource - they’re here for a reason

Seeking out people who are happy to sit in the mud with you, AND won’t let you stay there - they are a resource

This weighs heavy on me as I check in on my person today

This weights heavy as no one seems to want to talk about it until it’s too late

I’m not willing to wait until it’s too late