What A DANCE lesson showed me.
About Healing Into the Divine Feminine
The divine feminine meaning: the feminine aspect of the divine power that connects and binds the Earth together. In other words, it is goddess energy that exists within all of us.
What is it? It refers to the feminine energy in all of us, regardless of gender identity, and represents the nurturing, compassionate, and intuitive qualities often associated with femininity.
As a woman who was raised in a home where both parents worked, and I had a younger brother, I had a lot of responsibilities. As my life moved forward, I longed to be able to sit in the feminine energy and be the nurturer, supporter and relinquish the control and power that was necessary for survival. That’s not what happened for me. I became a single parent. And when I was in relationship, it was with men who were in their wounded masculine - which in today’s terms, the expectation of being served, and looked after, but also expecting their partner to provide and protect as well. This was me. I was expected to keep the perfect home, meals, raising children, AND provide income and protection to my home and family WHILE supporting and nurturing my partners dreams and goals. It was the catalyst to me saying “screw it, id rather do this by myself and have half the mental load and chore load by doing it by myself”. More masculine energy.
It wasn’t until about a year ago that I started to understand the power of learning to lean into feminine energy and do the healing work so I could let go of the control.
It wasn’t until about 6 months ago, that I learned that a woman can be powerful while sitting in her feminine energy. No control necessary
Flow and alignment. Heart centered. Intuitive.
Fast forward to last night.
It was a Friday night at a DANCE LESSON that allowed me to evaluate where I STILL wasn’t sitting in my feminine energy.
We were learning West Coast Swing - My FIRST lesson In a “beginner intermediate” class - talk about jumping into the deep end. Yep, that’s how I roll… with everything ;)
What did I learn?
I anticipated every next step and made a move - I didn’t TRUST my partner
(Father wounds were apparent to me in that moment)
I would assume it was on me to make the next move - because a woman in survival mode, that’s what I did and still, in some cases do
And without me making the next move, I was assuming my partner didn’t have me, wasn’t providing for me, and wasn’t going to protect me in guiding me.
I have openly admitted that I don’t trust most men and this was apparent to me within about 15 minutes of being in the lesson
Most of the men in my past didn’t provide safety and security in most ways.
It’s what my healing has been about, in a lot of ways.
Providing safety and security within.
Trust myself so I am secure and make decisions from a healed position, as opposed to a wounded, abandoned heart.
As the lesson progressed, this is what I realized.
I can not control it. It’s a DANCE
A true partnership that requires Connection & Unspoken cues and paying attention.
A Dance with a Strong Partner, A Strong Lead REQUIRES me to sit in my feminine and be open to receive.
Receive the guidance, trust that he’s not going to direct me into someone else, and keep me out of harms way.
Receive the direction that could turn into something incredible to be a part of, and for those watching, it is incredible to watch.
The more I focused on my partner and trusted that they would Truly lead me, the better the dance was. Trust. Putting the steps into their hand to LEAD, Release control, Be present
As the evening progressed and turned into the open dance portion, experienced couples showed up and were on the floor.
Watching them be playful and know each other so well, that they just moved through it without a hesitation or missed step, I was in awe. I WANT THAT in my life.
I had the opportunity to have many different partners throughout the night. Some were strong leaders and were patient with me shaking off the rust of not having a true dance partner in YEARS
Some were gracious and we had fun with it - we threw out Taking ourselves too seriously.
And as the night lead on, I found myself trusting, and enjoying the steps without anticipating or controlling them.
It was a true joy to be in the moment. Present.
And feeling the essence of my true Feminine Energy
As I write this, I feel a lightness that feels new. I feel heart centred
I feel in a state of flow - no need to control anything because everything that’s meant for me, will show up for me
AND what I know, is when I am in THIS space, good things show up for me.
This is the Power of a Woman in her Divine Feminine Energy