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Lessons from my Dad

November 17, 20233 min read

Father’s Day.

The day we celebrate dads.

It comes with mixed emotions… simply because I have a dad who chose absence.

And in the meantime, I’m grateful for the men who have stepped up in my children’s lives…

Being a good dad is a choice.

It’s a desire to be better than those before them. And I’ve seen clear evidence with that!

I’m grateful they have all done their best to step up and be dads and be there for the kids

And I’m grateful for a step dad who chose to love us…

He came into our lives with a ready made family

I imagine it would have been overwhelming at times

He gained a wife, two grown kids, and a grand baby all in the first year. And we all even moved in with them for a while. Lol. Poor guy.

He supported and cared for us like we were his own.

I’m grateful

And I’m grateful for a dad, who has taught me so much … in his presence and his absence.

He taught me all of the basic, farm girl stuff… like how to change a tire and so much more

He taught me to be competitive with myself and others. Always seeking to be better.

He taught me to be resilient.

He taught me I could do pretty much anything I could set my mind to, because I would always have my own back

He taught me work ethic.

He taught me to count on myself

My last memories of him, that were happy and awesome, was in my mid teens. And he’s taught me so much since then..

And I’m grateful for every lesson, and area of growth I’ve created for myself.

Over my parenting years, I have learned that Dads are so integral in the development of their kids. I haven’t always had these concepts modelled for me, therefore, I acknowledge that there will be a lot of points missing

As a single mom, it kills me watch women cut dads out of their children’s lives.

Separations happen because of what happened between adults… it shouldn’t be taken out on the kids by creating dads absence. And in this moment, I can hear the “ya but, he did…. “. Unless he’s harming the kids, there is absolutely NO reason dads shouldn’t be going involved.

Likewise, to the men who don’t show up.

Please, show up

Dads role, in a basic statement…

A dads job with his daughter, to help her see how a woman should be treated and what her worth is, through respect, building her up, modelling how a good man will treat his spouse and telling her she’s doing a great job, as the woman she’s becoming.

A dads job with his son, to help him see how a man treats his wife/girlfriend, with respect and communication. That he is worthy of a woman who is confident, self respecting, loving and grateful.

I know I still have so much to learn.

I’m grateful for the growth and the experience I gain from those who model it well…

“Imagine who you want them to become - Be that”

Anonymous

To the dads in my life…

May you feel loved and appreciated by those who you love on, and take care of 💙

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